Finding Meaning in Hard Times: How to Cope With Existential Anxiety and Life's Big Questions
What existential anxiety is, why big questions about meaning, mortality and purpose surface during hard times, what Viktor Frankl and research on post-traumatic growth teach us, and practical ways to find meaning, hope and steadiness when life feels uncertain.
Sometimes it hits in the middle of the night. Sometimes after a loss, a diagnosis, a breakup, a layoff or a big birthday. Sometimes it just creeps in on an ordinary Tuesday. What's the point of all this? Am I living the right life? What happens when it ends? Does any of it matter?
These are some of the oldest questions humans have ever asked. Philosophers, poets, religious traditions and psychologists have wrestled with them for thousands of years. When they show up in your own life, they can feel unsettling, even frightening. But they can also be a doorway to a deeper, more meaningful way of living. You don't have to have all the answers to find steadiness and hope.
What is existential anxiety?
Existential anxiety, sometimes called existential dread, is worry or unease about the big questions of life, such as:
- Meaning: Does my life have purpose?
- Mortality: What does it mean that I will die?
- Freedom and responsibility: Am I making the right choices?
- Isolation: Am I fundamentally alone?
- Identity: Who am I, really?
Psychiatrist Irvin Yalom, a pioneer of existential psychotherapy, described four "ultimate concerns" that humans face: death, freedom, isolation and meaninglessness. Feeling anxious about these isn't a sign that something is wrong with you. It's part of being human.
Why big questions surface in hard times
Hard times often shake the foundations we've built our lives on:
- Loss reminds us of mortality
- Illness confronts us with vulnerability
- Major life transitions, like divorce, retirement or an empty nest, raise questions about identity
- Global events, like pandemics, wars or climate change, can make the world feel uncertain. Our guide to climate anxiety explores one form of this.
- Milestone birthdays prompt reflection on time and choices
- Burnout can leave people wondering what it's all for. See our guide to burnout signs and recovery.
What Viktor Frankl teaches us about meaning
Viktor Frankl was an Austrian psychiatrist who survived Nazi concentration camps, including Auschwitz. In his 1946 book Man's Search for Meaning, he wrote about how people in the camps who held onto a sense of meaning, through love, purpose or faith, often found ways to endure unimaginable suffering.
Frankl developed an approach called logotherapy, based on the idea that the search for meaning is a primary human motivation. He suggested that meaning can be found in three main ways:
- Creating or doing something, like work, art or contributing to others
- Experiencing something or someone, like love, beauty, nature or connection
- The attitude we take toward unavoidable suffering
One of his most famous ideas is that while we can't always control what happens to us, we can choose how we respond.
Post-traumatic growth
Psychologists Richard Tedeschi and Lawrence Calhoun coined the term post-traumatic growth in the 1990s to describe positive changes some people experience after struggling with major life challenges. These can include:
- A greater appreciation for life
- Closer, more meaningful relationships
- A greater sense of personal strength
- New possibilities or directions in life
- Spiritual or existential growth
Post-traumatic growth doesn't mean the hard experience was good, or that suffering is necessary. It means that, alongside pain, growth is sometimes possible.
Signs existential anxiety is affecting you
- Persistent feelings that life is meaningless
- Anxiety about death or the future
- Feeling disconnected from yourself or others
- Questioning your life choices constantly
- Feeling stuck or directionless
- Trouble enjoying things you used to love
If these feelings are intense, long-lasting or come with hopelessness or thoughts of suicide, please reach out for help. In the U.S., call or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.
How to find meaning in hard times
1. Let the questions be
You don't have to solve life's biggest questions today. Sometimes, simply acknowledging them, "I'm wondering what really matters right now," can bring relief. Many people find that living with questions, rather than forcing answers, brings a kind of peace.
2. Clarify your values
Values are like a compass. When life feels uncertain, they help you decide what to do next. Ask: What matters most to me? What kind of person do I want to be? Our guide to finding your values has exercises to help.
3. Connect with others
Meaning often lives in relationships. Spend time with people you love, share your feelings and lean on your community. Our guide to loneliness and health explains why connection matters so much.
4. Help someone else
Contributing to others is one of the most reliable sources of meaning. Volunteering, helping a neighbor or supporting a friend can shift your focus and lift your spirits. Our guide to volunteering and wellbeing explores the research.
5. Find small daily meanings
Meaning doesn't have to be grand. A cup of tea in the morning light, a conversation with a child, a walk in the park or finishing a small project can all feel meaningful.
6. Spend time in nature
Nature can give perspective, reminding us that we're part of something larger. Experiences of awe, like watching a sunset or standing under a big sky, have been linked in research with a sense of meaning and connection. Our guide to awe walks shows how to seek it out.
7. Explore your spiritual or philosophical beliefs
Many people find meaning in faith, spiritual practice or philosophy. Reading, prayer, meditation and conversations with spiritual leaders or thoughtful friends can help. Our guide to what is spiritual wellness explores different paths.
8. Write about it
Journaling can help you explore your thoughts about meaning, mortality and purpose. Our guide to journaling for self-reflection has prompts.
9. Create something
Art, music, writing, gardening, cooking or building something can bring a sense of purpose and expression.
10. Practice presence
Mindfulness helps you focus on the present moment, which can ease anxiety about the past and future. Our guide to what is mindfulness is a good place to start.
11. Reflect on mortality gently
Many traditions encourage reflecting on death, not to frighten us, but to help us live more fully. Asking "If I had a year left, what would matter most?" can clarify priorities.
12. Seek support
Talking to a therapist, especially one familiar with existential or meaning-centered approaches, can help you work through these questions. Spiritual leaders and support groups can also offer guidance.
A simple meaning-making exercise
Take 10 minutes and write answers to these questions:
- What gives my life meaning right now, even in small ways?
- Who do I love, and who loves me?
- What have I learned from hard times in the past?
- What do I want to contribute to the world?
- What's one small step I can take this week that aligns with what matters most?
Meaning and purpose
Finding meaning is closely tied to having a sense of purpose, a reason to get up in the morning. Our guide to sense of purpose explores how purpose is linked with wellbeing and longevity, and how to discover yours.
Frequently asked questions
What is existential anxiety?
Existential anxiety is worry or unease about life's big questions, such as meaning, mortality, freedom and identity.
How do you find meaning when life feels pointless?
Focus on your values, connect with others, help someone, notice small daily meanings, spend time in nature, explore your spiritual beliefs and seek support if needed.
What did Viktor Frankl say about meaning?
Viktor Frankl believed that the search for meaning is a central human drive, and that meaning can be found through what we create, what we experience and the attitude we take toward suffering.
What is post-traumatic growth?
Post-traumatic growth refers to positive changes some people experience after struggling with major life challenges, such as deeper relationships or greater appreciation for life.
When should I get help for existential anxiety?
If feelings of meaninglessness or dread are intense, long-lasting or come with hopelessness or thoughts of suicide, reach out to a mental health professional or call or text 988 in the U.S.
Meaning grows from the inside out. See how your spiritual wellness is doing with our free wellness wheel quiz.
